Are You My Kind Of Friend?

I have quite a number of friends. There are those I genuinely like to be around and those, just like everyone else, I’d be better without.

I don’t like cutting people off, but in most cases, I find myself with people who I can’t tell how we became friends. Maybe my expectations are quite high but, let’s be frank, what’s the purpose of sticking around people who simply don’t care?

To avoid cutting people off, I decided to have my very own ‘To be my friend you have to’ kind of list. Check it out and you can most definitely use it.


Someone who likes the things I like

Oh yes! Can you imagine having a friend who doesn’t like the things you like? I mean, are we even friends? I like Ellen de Generes you must adore her to be my friend. Are we together?

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I was hanging out with someone a couple of weeks ago. I couldn’t believe it when he said he finds TV series a waste of time. Holy Christ, I live for TV Shows! There and then I knew that that was the last time we were ever hanging out. Ha-ha! I know am childish.

Someone Caring

“Buddy! You’ve been awfully quiet lately, what’s up”, “Jad, I heard you’re looking for a job, I’ll talk to my boss to see if there is room for you.” Having such a friend is a dream come true. A friend who is ready and willing to make you there equal, financially and regularly checks up on you, I believe that that is a caring friend. Care is always both ways, if I care, I expect you to show me some love.

A go getter, someone ambitious

Hell yeah, I don’t like laggards. To be my friend, my close friend you have to be a go getter, to be ambitious, serious and most importantly know what you want.

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Who wants to be close to someone who’s just there? Day after day…I know what you might be thinking “Oh Jad, chill…don’t be such a bore” I believe in life, there are two kinds of people, those who get what they want and those who simply don’t. I want to dominate with friends who get what they want.

Fun and outgoing

Oh God I love to have fun. Whenever I get the opportunity to do something crazily awesome, I have to take it and you, my good friend; you’ll have to tag along. You can’t be just there. Lol! I know you know people who are just there; a friend of mine uses the word zombie. For me it doesn’t necessarily mean being out going, but hey, just be fun.

Someone Religious

Let me be honest with you here, I am a Christian. How can I be an ally to someone who doesn’t believe in God? No way! You don’t have to be a Christian but you have (mark the word have) to be religious.

At least with that I know you got morals, there lines you simply cannot cross because religion, for me, brings morals.

Obviously that’s not it, there are so many other stuff that I check out for like honesty, loyalty, being trustworthy and even not being judgemental.

Be sure to use, my kind of friend list, if you doubt some of your friendships.

Bottled Up Feelings

It’s okay not to be okay. A phrase we’ve heard so many times its meaning has become meaningless to us. We’re still in that cocoon. Afraid to let others in, and when we actually decide to talk, our story is shared with every Tom, Dick and whoever the other guy was. We end up lonely, depressed and thoughts, ugly self-harming thoughts, terrorise our already hurt hearts

Mercy, my good friend, loved Peter. She had planned a life with him. They planned to visit places once they started making some real cash. Where they would settle down together and can you believe they even had names for their future kids? They were dumb, quite deep and very much in love.

Ever felt like you were meant to be with someone? How everything about you blend in together to make that perfect, thirst quenching cocktail? Ha! That’s how they were. I really wanted to have that kind of relationship.
Sadly, just like most romantic movies, they broke up. It’s weird how we tell ourselves that some things will not break our tiny hearts. How we lie to ourselves to get through some heart breaks, losses and even betrayals by those we hold dear.

“I didn’t even like him.” “I don’t need her to survive.” “Am independent, for crying out loud!”

We end up posting Bible motivational verses. Some celebrity affirmation quotes on our social media platforms just to show the world that we’re fine. Knowing very well that our hearts are broken and we are definitely not fine.
My mum likes reminding me “A problem shared is a problem half solved.”

Let me wind up Mercy and her guy’s story. You see, unlike a romantic movie, they didn’t get back together. Mercy was torn up. Mood level at zero, slowly by slowly she let out her feelings, she said “Were it not for my aunt, I don’t know what I would’ve done.” When it comes to heartbreaks, a problem shared is a problem solved.
On the other hand James decided to be strong. To be fine for the cameras, on cloud nine.

Bottled feelings will never disappear. They’ll eat you up and if you don’t do anything, just like Mercy’s ex, you might end up hurting yourself .Yes, he hurt himself. Tried suicide and if his brother entered his room a minute late, he would be dead.

Most of us are like him. We bottle things up, sometimes cry ourselves to sleep and lie just to seem okay. We need to change. We have to change. So let’s try opening up to live a healthier and happier life. There is so much more that life has in stored for us.